The only thing that is insusceptible to ending in life is a perception that some things must end.

So apparently, the internet isn't as vast as I thought it was. Even out of a quarter of a tenth of a trillion web pages, which you might be able to visit every single one of in your lifetime if you started now at the rate of 10 pages per second, people have stumbled across this blog. I guess I underestimated people's use of the internet.

Anyways, my blogging days are over, as well as a lot of other things...

Mark Hammitt of Sanctus Real put it well when he wrote the lyric, "Someday we'll meet again, 'cause that's how the story ends, it's so hard to say goodbye." Chester Bennington of Linkin Park put it well in his lyric, "Sometimes solutions aren't so simple, sometimes goodbye's the only way."

There is no experience in this lifetime that is harder than saying goodbye, and yet it is an inevitable and sometimes necessary part of life which we all face at some time or another. Nobody wants to say goodbye, we hate it. If we could somehow walk through life without ever having to say goodbye, everybody would do it, no questions asked. In 2009 I had to say goodbye to the house I had resided in since 1999, and in 2010 I have already had to say goodbye to our minivan that I have ridden in since 1998. These are silly, lifeless things to say goodbye to, and yet it was still hard. There is still the gut-wrenching feeling of change, the feeling that something that has stayed true and consistent is gone forevermore. If these things were hard for me, how much more relationships and friendships!

You see, I didn't have a relationship with the house or the van. They are not living, breathing people who I fellowship with and laugh with and miss their company when they're gone. But people are different. People can't be replaced by whipping out the checkbook and making a purchase. People are priceless and irreplaceable, and that's what makes goodbyes hurt. Don't kid yourself, you cannot replace a friend. You may find a new one, but you will never replace your old one.

Above all, death is the hardest goodbye to cope with. There is nothing that seems to be more worthy of grief and lamentation...and really, that is how it should be and is. Death should not settle well with us, because apart from Christ, it is the due end of all of humanity and our loved ones. Worse yet, not only do we never see them again if they're not saved, they are under God's wrath and separated from Him for all eternity. Death should strike this fear into us; it should rightly cause us this incurable pain. Well, incurable apart from Christ. There is no relief to the sting of death but from Christ. We must taste the sting of death to taste the sweetness of new life, expressed in one of my favorite verses:

"O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?"
1 Corinthians 15:55

Christ provides the only comfort to the most sorrowful experience we will ever face: death. When we mourn for the death of a loved one, every fiber in our body cries out that "this isn't right, we shouldn't be separated", and that is correct. We're not meant to be separated, but it is the end result of our sin. Relationships with our loved ones and most of all, God, are not meant to end. God created us to enjoy all eternity with Him, but through our sin we have chosen to break this bond and spend eternity apart from Him. If we ever doubt the magnitude of sin, let us remember that sin brings death!

While death is the most extreme form of goodbyes, goodbyes of other types are also hard. In 2008, two very dear families left SGC in Aurora. This was emotional and heartbreaking, and at times it felt like the grief would never leave. No one has ever replaced these families or ever will, and the grief of their absence on Sunday mornings will never be eliminated completely either. That's one of the downfalls of this life. We miss people's presence due to separation, and there's no solace for their absence. But one day, we will never have to say goodbye anymore. We will never have to mourn the death of a loved one at their funeral or be separated from dear friends or family. Oh friends, I await this day. I await joy forevermore, that we will all be together forever, and not only that, but we will be with our loving King and Savior, whom we will praise throughout all eternity.

It is through tears that I make the following decision to move on...hopefully the insomnia will leave me soon and I shall be able to rest well again. I love you all. The specific hole that each of you occupied in my heart will never be filled by anyone else. Praise the Lord, for He alone has made our goodbyes only temporary.

Please note, the following refers to all relationships, not just marital ones.

---

Relationships
Joel Petraglia
© 2010

A relationship is a wonderful and terrible thing.

There is no beginning more exciting, and there is no ending more terrifying.

There is nothing our feet muster as much strength to run to, and there is nothing our feet muster as much strength to run away from.

There is no wetland with a sun that shines as brightly, and there is no desert with a sun that causes more deadly heat waves.

There is no sword of greater protection as it slays off enemies, and there is no sword that has pierced the heart to a greater depth.

There is no beast more majestic in stature, and there is no beast more ferocious and frightening.

There is no ship whose sails carry it a greater distance, and there is no ship that has sunken to deeper trenches.

There is no plane that has soared farther in the skies, and there is no plane that has plummeted farther to its doom.

There is no fire with provision of greater warmth, and there is no fire capable of greater burn.

There is no river as cool and thirst quenching, and there is no river with more fierce rapids to drown in.

There is no fruit sweeter to the taste, and there is no fruit with more fatal of poison.

There is no balm with a greater capacity to cure and heal, and there is no illness with a greater capacity to infect and kill.

There are no tears more joyous and glorious, and there are no tears more wretched and heart-wrenching.

There are no memories more cherishable, and there are no memories more unbearable.

There is no invasion of thoughts more delightful, and there is no invasion of thoughts more detestable.

There is nothing that leads us to dance more happily, and there is nothing that causes us to fall flat on our face and be crushed more thoroughly.

There is nothing that bids one to marvel love more deeply, and there is nothing that bids one to scorn love more deeply.

There is nothing that behooves one more to ponder life, and there is nothing that behooves one more to ponder death.

There is nothing that brings us as often to love our desires, and there is nothing that brings us as often to hate our desires.

There is nothing that makes the heart race faster in ecstasy, and there is nothing that makes the heart throb more constantly in pain.

There is no greater earthly treasure gained, and there is no greater earthly treasure lost.

There is no truer joy of the heart than that derived from a relationship, and there is no truer sorrow than that derived from one.

A relationship is wondrous, horrid, dazzling, jarring, lustrous, torturous, captivating, devastating, liberating, strangling, blissful, excruciating, gentle, violent, pacifying, vexing, breathtaking, loathsome, extraordinary, disturbing, downright unmatched in beauty, and downright unmatched in vileness.

A relationship is a wonderful and terrible thing.